Spouse Jokes.

Funny quotes about marriage.

PreAmble: I didn't write these. They were sent to me from an undisclosed source. They are funny.

April and I were lying in bed the other day. My hands were slowly finding their way across her body. I whispered, "I'm gonna make you the happiest woman in the world." She whispered back, "I'll miss you."

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I bought my wife a new car. She called and said, "There was water in the carburetor."
I asked her , "Where's the car?" She replied, "In the lake."

Henny Youngman

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A little boy asked his father, "Daddy, how much does it cost to get married?"
The father replied, "I don't know son, I'm still paying."

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Eighty percent of married men cheat in America. The rest cheat in Europe.

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I married Miss Right. I just didn't know her first name was Always.

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Just think, if it weren't for marriage, men would go through life thinking they had no faults at all.

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The most effective way to remember your wife's birthday is to forget it once.

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